Doctored!

Has this ever happened to you?  We hear so many horrible stories these days about internet photo-doctoring. People seeing themselves online with features added to or subtracted from their photos – sometimes until they’re unrecognizable even to themselves! Didn’t think it would ever happen to me!

Here’s the story.

I attended a lovely event on Saturday morning – a brunch and silent auction to raise money to help women who have no health insurance to cover the cost of having a mammogram. The brunch was held in a very nice restaurant and had a Kentucky Derby theme (Saturday having been Kentucky Derby Day.)  Mint Juleps. Roses.  And hats –  gorgeous hats! Most of the women attending wore hats of all descriptions. Glorious, gorgeous hats! They would fit in admirably at the Derby – or even the Royal Wedding! When I got the invitation, I figured it would be a hat crowd. So, it seemed de rigueur to do likewise. I went hat shopping. And much to my amazement, I found one that looked good!  I’ve always shied away from large brims – given my height. But this one surprised me! It dipped strategically down over one eye. It seemed flattering almost! I bought it. I tried it on dozens of times at home.  Black ribbon woven into white straw. I accessorized it. I tied on a black and white striped ribbon, added a large bow and popped in a black rose. It was uncharacteristically decorative for me. But the Wedding inspired me. And I thought, why not? Make a splash, Lesley!

Wore it with a BCBG Max Azaria black and white dress with low cut front and bunched up waist line that would certainly be approved by Stacy London and what’s-his-name on “What Not to Wear.”  Stylin’!

I went to the brunch feeling pretty darn hot, if I may so myself. Walked confidently through the crowd. Smiled sexily for the portrait photographer. Felt goo-ood! Had a grand time. Got comments!

Saw the photos on the photographer’s web site today. That’s when I knew I had been duped! He added two chins! And a chubby chest! And a goofy smile! And that hat!!! It was never THAT big!  And good grief, I’m not really THAT short!!!! Am I?