Previously on Neufs: Buying a fridge at a store that closes at 5:30 on Friday turns out to be a futile exercise.
Episode Two: “May I Speak to Customer Service, Please?”
Saturday; 1:00 pm
Neufeld residence; Kitchen.
(Ken and Lesley enter from a shopping trip and unload
grocery bags)
L: I am very excited about the new fridge we ordered. All
those new drawers and dispensers. I can’t wait. I’m giddy with excitement.
(Laugh track: light chuckle)
K: I’m glad you’re excited. Want to go look at windows?
L: Hey, you’re on a home-repair roll!
K: I just want to see about replacing the storms and screens
before winter. It’s got to save energy if the wind isn’t howling through the living
room. (Laugh track: medium chuckle)
L: As exciting as that sounds, no, thanks, you go ahead.
(Some time later. Ken returns.)
K: I might be the best husband in the world.
L: Yes. You are. But what have you done to deserve the title
this time?
K: I bought you a vacuum cleaner! (Ken produces the latest
model small portable electric broom. Laugh track: light chuckle)
L: You bought ME a vacuum cleaner? I hate vacuuming. I kicked
our last vacuum down the basement stairs. (Laugh track: light chortle.) You mean
you bought yourself a vacuum cleaner. How does this make you the best husband
in the world?
K: It isn’t your Christmas present. (Laugh track: big
laughs)
L: Good point. How did you make out with windows?
K: Fine. An estimator is coming at 2:00 tomorrow.
L: Oh, nuts! On a Sunday? Can’t he come on Monday? I was hoping
we could go on a Sunday drive to go leaf-peeping tomorrow. It’s going to be
such a beautiful day.
K: (Sighs) O.K. Let me call and find out if I can change it.
L: I can be home Monday afternoon.
K: (On the phone with the dispatcher at the big box hardware
store) Yes, I have an appointment set up
with someone to measure for storm windows on our house for tomorrow at 2:00. I’d
like to change that please.
Can you Monday? (To L: ) Can you do Tuesday?
L: No
K: How about Wednesday?
L: No good.
K: Thursday?
L: Nah-uh. I can do Friday. I’ll be waiting for an
electrician anyway. Can they come Friday?
K: (to dispatcher:) Friday? No.
L: Oh, fine, fine. Let him come tomorrow.
K: (to dispatcher:) Alright, let’s leave the appointment as it
is. We’ll be here at 2:00.
(Next scene: Sunday; 2:30 pm)
K: O.K. Where is this guy? (Laugh track: light, knowing
snort)
L: I know! We raced home from leaf-peeping for a window guy
who hasn’t even shown up!
K: (on the phone to the window estimator) Yes, we were
expecting you at 2:00 to measure for storm windows? Uh huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. You
don’t have us on your schedule AT ALL? No. Right. They never told you that you
have an appointment this afternoon? For storm windows? Right. You’re a window
estimator, right? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Well, we made an appointment with the
dispatcher for 2:00 for someone to measure for storm windows today. Yeah, we
thought Sunday was weird, too. (Laugh track: guffaws.)
(Pause.)
K: Yeah, O.K. 5:00 would be fine. You’re in Fayetteville,
but you can be here by 5:00? O.K. Thanks. See you then. (to L:) Well, that’s just ridiculous. They
never told this guy he had an appointment!
L: We re-organized our whole day for this!
K: I know. I’m going for a nap. (Laugh track: medium laugh.)
Sunday; 5:00:
Estimator arrives.
E: So sir, what are we lookin’ at here?
K: Storms and screens. Replacing them.
E: Uh, yeah. We don’t do that.
K: What do you mean? You don’t do that.
E: Yeah. We don’t do that.
K: O.K. Why did they tell me at the store that you do?
E: I dunno. They messed up I guess.
K: Yeah, I guess they did. So, we reorganized our whole day,
waited for you to come at 2:00 and then waited for you to come at 5:00. And you
don’t do this. That’s just perfect.
E: What can I tell ‘ya, sir?
(Ken on the phone a few minutes later)
K: Yes, customer service, please…..
Cue theme music.
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