Ever since I began blogging I've wanted to find a hook. You know, something that would make me famous. Like Julie Powell. Remember her? She was the blogger who cooked her way through Julia Child's "Mastering the Art of French Cooking," blogged about it, got thousands of readers, and wound up with a book and a major motion picture made about her, starring Amy Adams and Meryl Streep. That's the kind of famous I'm after. A movie about me starring Meryl Streep.
Alas, brilliant ideas have escaped me. Until now!
Not too long ago, I picked up a cookbook at a garage sale. I couldn't believe my eyes! There it was, Betty Crocker's "Dinner in a Dish" — nearly-new looking, displayed on a table out on someone's driveway, going for only 25 cents. I had to have it! This book had been a life-changer for me in my pre-teens. My mother had a copy. It contained 324 recipes devoted to casseroles — complete with menu plans for "company best" or "bridge night," plus party tips, serving suggestions for salads and sides, and hints for hostesses.
Predating crock pots by a few years, casseroles in Pyrex bakeware ruled the day when "Dinner in a Dish" was published in 1965. I drooled over the illustrations: Lobster Newburg. Lattice-topped Meatball Bake. Chicken Pot Pie. Shrimp Creole. Waikiki Pork Chop Dinner. Ham and Potato Chip Dumplings.
Mom and I made dozens of recipes from this cook book. I imagined myself so grown-up; a smart society-hostess-type, lithe as a ballerina, whisking Turkey Divan to the table for my ooh-ing and aww-ing guests.
I glanced at the cover of this one-dish-dictionary the other day. That's when it hit me. I could do a Julie & Julia type blog! A Lesley & Betty spin. I could work through every recipe and write about it with a 1965, "Mad Men" kind of vibe. Brilliant, Lesley! I opened the book and began.
First up: Chicken Sorrento. The subtitle says: "Delicious with hot biscuits and a colorful fruit salad served in lettuce cups." Right. Some Pillsbury refrigerator biscuits and canned fruit cocktail in iceberg lettuce would do nicely, I thought. No kale or quinoa invited to this party! Let's get started.
Coat chicken breasts. with flour, paprika, and dried parsley flakes. Brown in melted Crisco shortening. (Hmm. Got to rethink that one. Olive oil. Better.) Add chopped mushrooms to the pan. (So far so good.) Stir in cream of celery soup. (OK, if I have to - just to be authentic.) Add sour cream. (Uh, oh.) Add cubed Velveeta. (Good grief! I haven't bought Velveeta in, well, ever.) Stir in cooked macaroni. Spoon into casserole dish. Pour more canned soup over top. Crush corn flakes for a crunchy topping (optional.) Bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes.
OMG! You can just taste it, can't you? Creamy, soupy, cheesy Chicken Sorrento: pretty much a classic casserole. Just the ticket for a family dinner served on TV tables while watching "Green Acres." Comfort food. What our childhood tasted like: caloric.
It didn't take long to browse a few pages before realizing that I would be 300 pounds if I pursued this project, even WITH low fat, low sodium versions of the canned foods and dairy products.
Ah, well. Times have changed since 1965. And why would I want to alienate you, my friends who are vegetarian, gluten-free or lactose-intolerant?
No. It's back to the drawing board for me to come up with a different plan for blog fame.
I wonder what Julie Powell is doing today? She's probably a TV chef by now. And doesn't use cream of celery soup.
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